The boy has a new rebellious streak which is outshining his otherwise docile behaviour. The newfound angst and withdrawal from the world can be attributed to the changing weather ( we all have winter blues ) but an active brat like him usually have enough all weather tricks up his sleeves.
The conversation, that followed a “Whatever” rant :
“What is wrong with you A? You are not even ten and behaving like a teenager already!” I asked, exasperated with his sulking.
“Maybe it is hormones, Mommy. I am growing up!!”. He retorted back.
I rolled my eye and caught the “Whatever” thrown my way!
Oh my, this boy is really growing up!
Is the ten the new teen?
One of the rare days when he got all chatty, he came and whispered in my ear,
“You know Mommy? I have a really dark side”. The really was really stretched and it got my attention.
My eyes lit up. The naive good Samaritan has a dark side too. I was all ears and edged him to continue.
” I snigger at my friends, behind their back when they are mean to me. I turn my face, roll my eyes and say aaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. ”
We both laugh, Hi5 and hug.
Sometimes, being angry is the only way children show their hurt. Talk to them, Mommys.Don't let them shut down. Probe gently. Use your mommy tricks. Help them reconcile and heal. Children want to communicate in their own ways , at their pace, in their own space. Reach out. Find a midway and connect.
I hear you, my child. I whisper. New surroundings, new school & new environment to live in, he has taken the transition in his stride.
Then, he looks me in the eye. “Mommy, do you have a dark side too?”
The twinkling eyes expect the truth to be told.
“Yes, I do, baba. Everyone has a dark side.”
“Out with it.” He is giggling now.
” Shh, shh. I cannot.” I hush him down.
” Tell me. Tell me. Tell me. ” The tantrum reappears.
“Let’s download a new Stephen Hawking book on Amazon.” I offer a bribe.
Bribe accepted. Disaster averted. We move to Jupiter and its moons.
Books have been our escape and destination. We started reading the same books to both the children and along the way, they found the genres that stimulate their curious young minds and comfort their young hearts. In the tumultous journery of life, they have found constant friends in characters of their favorite books.
“Who do you aspire to be?” I asked him once.
“A cricketer, of course.”! With a big stress on “Of”.
“Duh. You have known forever.” The antics resurfaced.
“How about becoming an astronaut? You love the space.” I offered a twig leaf.
” I don’t want to die in the space, mommy.” pat came the reply, with eyes glued to the Kindle.
(Skipping the Gyan & philosophical talk that transpired in between).
” I can be an astronomer, though.” He paused and looked up. Ok. A second career choice after Cricket.
He will continue with his cricket coaching, making teams, watching matches, keeping scores while marvelling at the wonders of the astronomical world.Who knows what destiny holds for them?
The teenager wanted us to watch a Japanese Anime movie, ” Wolf Children”. She had been to Bookaroo Lit fest that afternoon and was overwhelmed with the engaging sessions attended. This was her way to calm down and relax before calling it a day.
Before the movie, a roleplay happened. Kids shared their experiences of their day.
” You are an idiot. ” Teenager shouted.
” You are a fool head”. Boy laughed.
Boy and teenager were re-enacting the session attended at Bookaroo earlier, laughing & throwing insults at each other. This was a session where children shared how their parents hurled abuses at them in anger.
“What did you share?” I was curious. Also, it was a parenting challenge & mirroring. Are we abusive parents?
“Hmm. I couldn’t think of anything, Mum.” the teenager said, thoughtfully.
She was just being her kind self and protecting my vanity.
” Hmm, you said something about my rear anatomy the other day, but I did not say it.” The boy rolled his eyes and laughed, throwing his head back!
Ok. Corrective action needed here. Did a mental check for future reference.
The teenager and I come back to snuggle in the blanket & watch the movie in the study. Boy lingered around for a while, sulked for being excluded and went off to sleep.
Teenager set her laptop and filled me in on what to expect.
“I have already watched it twice, Mum. I won’t cry again,” she says gently. “I am quite invested in this movie. Hope you like it, too. It sort of reminded me of how A & I have been, as siblings.”
I nod and we hold hands, watching the tearjerker movie.
Wolf Children is a story of a resilient and determined mother, raising two wolf-human kids and watching them transform into different personalities, choosing different destinies from what they started out from. It was kind of metaphorical to the way our kids are being raised and chose their path.More of it, another time.
The boy and I have a Netflix date due now and he wants to watch RichieRich. This is in retrospect to the movie date with the teenager earlier.
Balances of life. A mother can’t afford to let the scale tilt heavier on either side.
Not a parenting expert. Striving to be a parent first; after being myself, before being anyone else in the world.
It is a balmy Tuesday morning and I wanted to share this experience. Thank you for reading my random musing. Have a happy day, folks!